Understanding Morality in 6-Year-Olds: A Journey Through Right and Wrong

By the age of six, children begin to develop a basic understanding of right and wrong, influenced by their experiences, upbringing, and social interactions. At this stage, they can recognize simple moral concepts such as fairness and sharing. Most six-year-olds understand that certain behaviors can lead to positive or negative consequences. However, their understanding is often still quite simplistic and may be influenced more by external rules set by parents or teachers rather than a deep moral reasoning.

Dependency on External Rules

Children of this age often know that hitting is wrong but might struggle with more complex moral dilemmas or the nuances of ethical behavior. Their understanding is heavily influenced by external factors, such as rules set by parents or teachers. This external reliance is a natural part of their development as they learn to follow guidelines to avoid consequences. For instance, they may understand that sharing is good but might not grasp the complexity of lying or stealing.

Consciousness and Moral Sentiments

Research suggests that even when six-year-olds cheat, they are aware that they are doing something 'wrong' or 'bad,' and their behavior reflects this sentiment. This indicates the presence of a developing conscience, though it is often not deeply introspective or ethical at this stage.

Nature vs. Nurture in Moral Development

Children are born with a conscience, but some kids may possess a more open and gentle level of consciousness, while others may have less and carry prenatal negative tendencies. This suggests a mix of genetic and environmental influences on moral development. Nurture plays a significant role, as it provides the context and cues for children to understand and navigate moral issues. Parents and educators are crucial in shaping a child's moral compass.

Early Moral Behavior: Fairness and Troublemaking

At six, children are highly concerned with fairness. Rewards for good behavior and punishments for misbehavior are triggers that they can easily grasp. This stage marks a shift from pure self-centeredness to a more social and moral understanding. However, kids at this age can be very different—some love adventure, some prefer quiet play, and others show compassion. Some, unfortunately, can be mean and bully at a very young age. Parenting plays a significant role in guiding this development.

The Evolution of Moral Understanding

Understanding right versus wrong is a gradual process that doesn't happen overnight. Before age six, children primarily act as "parent pleasers" and are focused on avoiding trouble. The development of a "sense of self" around this time allows children to see themselves in relation to others and understand that harmful actions inflicted upon others also harm themselves. This foundational understanding is the building block for more complex moral reasoning.

The Path to Goodness

One's journey towards moral understanding and goodness begins with a sense of self and the realization that harmful actions are inherently self-destructive. This existential process can be challenging, leading to inner distress as children navigate complex moral dilemmas. However, it is a fundamental part of becoming a healthy human.

The Elements of Goodness

The process of fostering goodness involves several key elements:

Transcendent Love: This is the act of hoping for the virtuous betterment of the inner child-chooser within ourselves and others. It is unconditional and frees individuals from fear, fostering confidence, understanding, and skill without anger or defensiveness. Virtue: Character traits like truthfulness, wisdom, logic, prudence, fearlessness, trustworthiness, trustworthiness, self-restraint, forgiveness, organization, cleanliness, caring, praiseworthiness, principled, generous, humble, and courageous. Wisdom: The ability to avoid traps and succeed in life and relationships by using accumulated insights.

Understanding these elements can help cultivate a deeper sense of morality in both young children and adults. As children grow, their ability to navigate and understand moral issues typically becomes more sophisticated, reflecting the complex interplay of natural tendencies and nurturing influences.