How to Respond When Someone Invites Themselves to Your Dinner Party
Invitations that extend beyond the written message can be a little tricky. When a guest is already knocking on your door and invites themselves into your home or plans for a dinner party, what is the most polite thing to say?
Polite but Firm Responses
One of the best ways to handle an unexpected guest is with a polite but firm response. A friendly yet firm invitation to bring something to contribute to the meal shows both thoughtfulness and practicality. For example, you could say, 'Thanks for considering my home for your gathering, but I don’t mind if you bring something to contribute towards the meal.' This shows that you are open-minded and willing to help, but also manages expectations.
Depending on the timing and circumstances, your response should adjust. If it's a busy week and you are dealing with tough situations, you might be less inclined to entertain unexpected guests. Perhaps, you could suggest they bring something from Quora's HQ in Mt. View California for their all-you-can-eat cafeteria. This response can also be shared with humor or seriousness, according to your comfort level and the relationship's dynamics.
Direct but Honest Responses
If you feel that directness is necessary, you can be blunt about your feelings. However, it's important to balance honesty with kindness. For instance, you might say, 'Who in the hell do you think you are inviting yourself to my home? ' This can be a backlash for serious behavior but can be conveyed with a laugh or in a serious tone, depending on the relationship and the context.
Another straightforward approach is to be forthright about your availability. If it's a casual setting, you can say, 'Yes, come on over, we'd love to have you!' If you are busy, simply say, 'No, we’re busy.' You don’t need any unnecessary excuses for either response. Your truth is the best response, and it's polite to be direct and clear about your intentions.
General Etiquette and Considerations
Ultimately, the key is to be consistent with your responses. If you have a friend who is invited regularly, keeping the invitation open can make them feel welcome. However, if a guest regularly attempts to bypass your boundaries, it might be time to set clearer limits. It's important to communicate clearly and swiftly, without leading to misunderstandings or harmful feelings.
When unsure, it's always better to be clear and kind. After all, your guests’ feelings should be considered, and they deserve to know the outcome of their invitation.